Just ants

Aab is fascinated with ants.  He has this strong instinctive feeling that they are far superior to human beings.  He loves sitting in a corner and watching the rows of ants walking with so much discipline and team spirit to collect morsels of food and bring them to their den. They even pause for a fraction of a second and touch the ones on the return journey, as though to convey love or salutation, and merrily continue in the path trod by those in front of them. No fights, no groupism, no rebels, and no one trying to assert authority – and the army keeps merrily marching on!

To test them out Aab sometimes puts down a piece of a biscuit or cookie he is eating, and observes what happens.  In no time a single roaming ant turns up.  Aab watches closely as the ant seems to taste a tiny piece of the biscuit, satisfies himself, refuses to gorge on the remainder himself, and quietly disappears. Very soon he sees a row of them making a beeline towards the biscuit.  He cannot recognize whether the scout ant is in the lead or not, but they sure know where they are headed. Not one of them starts eating by himself – they all pick up one morsel and start their return journey in a systematic row. No idling, gossiping, overtaking or wandering off.  There is no visible ‘boss’ supervising their behavior, but they don’t seem to need one.

To test them out Aab sweeps a portion of the row of ants gently.  They tumble over, are scattered, but within seconds they get back into line and continue their task.  Unfortunately Aab cannot see what happens inside the anthill, but he can guess how the tasks are carried out with equal responsibility and commitment. Aab looks around to see if he can find any group of human beings who behave in such exemplary manner – but in years and years of his observation he has never found one.

Aab wonders what it would have been like to be born as an ant. No competition, no jealousies, no worries about who will cheat you, and no striving to get the better of anyone else. No one gets thrown out of his job, no one is promoted or demoted, no one’s rights are trampled upon. He wishes that at least he should have been able to talk to ants.  They would have so much to enlighten him, and he could have made lifelong friends.  But unfortunately Aab is born a human and has to die one.  In the intervening years he has to observe sadly all the cunning, cheating, malice and jealousies of the “superior race.”

Travel to happiness

There is a famous proverb: “Man travels all over the world looking for happiness, only to find it at home.”  The mystic poet Kabir Das had also said something similar about searching everywhere for God and then finding out that He resides in your own home.

I have always been a critical admirer of proverbs and quotes of famous men.  But I do not blindly follow and applaud them.  There are times when I find some very popular proverbs either irrelevant, senseless, or even exactly opposite of what I believe in.  When I identify such a quote, I just ignore it and move on.  But I find so many people who blindly read, repeat, forward and quote to others, without giving a deep thought to their relevance – more so if it is a quote by a “foreigner” with an impressive sounding Western name.

With due respect to many great people (who may often say great pearls of wisdom, but not always so), I think we should introspect and evaluate the relevance or usefulness of a quote.  Going again to the proverb at the top, is it necessary that we come back after our explorations and find happiness at home?  What if we have grouchy family members, or if we are going through stress at home for various reasons?  We can perhaps find happiness when we explore beyond and see how others are dealing with their life situations. 

Travel is a great education in itself and even a source of joy.

Where does Aab belong?

“Where do you belong to ?” People often ask this question to new persons they meet. Whenever someone asks this to Aab, he is puzzled. He would  perhaps be able to answer the “where” if he knew the meaning of “belong”. On the one side, he firmly believes that everyone and everything in this universe is connected. On the other, he wonders who belongs to who. When we cannot even own the air we breathe, how can places own us ?

   Aab sits on a patch of ground and wonders whether he can belong to it. He walks on a road and muses whether he belongs to it.  He walks on a road and muses whether he belongs to the path. He looks up at the sky and clouds and refuses to believe that he can belong even to a tiny patch in it. And as if to prove his point, the clouds move away, change shape, disintegrate – and disappear.

   He listens  with amusement when people talk proudly about their ancestry, their roots, their “native” place, and their possessiveness over it. There is such a strong need to belong as though by ourselves we are incomplete. We need to reassure our fickle minds and appease our insecurity by the reassurance that we are not alone and we need not fend for ourselves. But Aab finds a strange relief in not belonging. He has no home town, no mother tongue, no family tree. Every moment that he is with any friend or stranger, he feels belonged to that person. When someone reaches out to him, he holds the hand, when someone moves back, he moves on.

Where are they headed?

I was invited by Public TV to conduct a Career Guidance session at their Career Fest in Palace Grounds.  Though I was pleasantly surprised to see that there were hundreds in the audience (and I was flattered when some of them told me, “we came only to listen to your talk”), I was once again concerned about the absolute lack of awareness or knowledge about the immense possibilities and options that today’s world offers, and more so with the method they need to use to select their career. 

As adults we force children to go on studying for hours and hours, day after day, completing “portions” and facing innumerable exams. But we do not give them any inputs to actually make them successful and happy human beings.  We do not guide them and teach them how to take the right decisions.  Worse, we not allow them to follow their dreams and aspirations, and wish to make them robots by getting into routine and boring careers just because there is more “scope” in them. It is the responsibility of every adult to ensure that we allow children to blossom out and grow the way they want.

Aside: Western countries were spending more and more money making robots, till they realized that very intelligent third world youngsters are willing to work like robots at much less cost !

compete with yourself

Do I need to put the other person down to show how good I am?

We do have to compete in many areas, we have to win over to move on, and we have to face conflict from those who hold different views.  That is fine. But what I wonder about is…..

When facing any opposition or when there is a need to prove that we are right, why do we focus only on pointing out the negative aspects of the opponent, instead of highlighting where we are right or what we have achieved.  It is done by politicians (listen to election speeches), religious gurus, business competitors and even by family members.  A neutral person listening to such put-downers and criticism is not interested in the unpleasantness and wants to keep away from both parties.

I feel that if I am confident about myself I should stop accusing the other person and emphasize on what I have done or why I deserve better treatment or reward.  Trying to climb over others’ shoulders may make you go higher – but before you know it he or someone else will be climbing over your shoulder and you are back to square one.  Comparing oneself with others, trying to prove I am “better than thou” not only does not get long term results, but makes life a little bitter.

How about ignoring your opponents and detractors, and focusing on yourself, your progress, your skills and your goals?  How about competing with yourself?

Try it out, and make it a habit.

Cricket and Me

Cricket and Me

I was never been a sportsperson. The only time I played cricket was when a team had absolutely no choice but to make me the eleventh man, and I batted last in a match we miraculously won.  But my association with cricket was quite strong due to my eldest cousin who was a role model to me.

Mumtaz Hussain, left arm spinner, handsome, charming and brilliant in his studies, captained our school team and started playing for the Hyderabad Ranji Trophy team when he was barely 17.  I would follow him to the grounds and watch mesmerized when the likes of Pataudi, Jaisimha and Abid Ali spoke endearingly and encouragingly to him.  He was the “chhotu” of the team, but to me he was ten feet tall.

Along with him I watched in admiration the players who excelled, played to their full capacity, and made us proud of them.  We applauded our school team, our Club team, our state team, the South Zone team, and of course the Indian team – which played the rare Test matches which were occasions looked forward to months in advance.  The newspapers were our only source of information, and during the matches, the commentators, and the “expert” commentators kept us glued to our radio sets.  We celebrated when our state or national team won, we felt sad when they lost, but we never equated match victory to the capability of the players – they continued to remain our heroes.

Our cricketers did not get any national awards or cash prizes.  They mostly commuted on two-wheelers, sometimes borrowed ones.  Between matches they worked in banks or government departments.  They were thrilled giving autographs, and celebrations meant going to the nearby darshini for a dosa or indulge in a biryani in an ordinary restaurant. Many of them, like Mumtaz faded away when they could no longer play, and were happy being ordinary citizens regaling their grandchildren about their “good old days.”

Days went by, and cricket changed. Today players are ‘bought’, they are ‘auctioned’ and they play for whichever ‘owner’ pays them most. They earn in crores in the normal course, and more than that if they are into match-fixing.  Huge amounts are gambled in every match. Many people watch cricket on TV more to ogle at the attractive cheer-leaders than to admire the players. Politicians get deeply involved in cricket bodies, courts are made to spend valuable judicial time adjudicating scandals. Top cricketers get more honors and adulation than the most courageous military men or the ceaselessly toiling social workers.

Though cricket has a unique charm which is so different from other sports, and there are such thrilling and unpredictable moments in the game, what is happening outside the field has saddened me.  I wonder at all the stalwarts like my cousin who sacrificed their entire lives for the game (he worked as a Head Clerk in the bank till his untimely death, a benefit match in his honor got him the fabulous sum of 14,000 rupees). It was called a ‘gentlemen’s game’, which sounds like a joke when I see the behavior of today’s players.  However much I cherish and am nostalgic about the game, I somehow cannot bring myself to overlook its degeneration, so I change the channel and watch comedy serials.

29^th January 2018